Rejection

This post may be a bit disjointed - it's one o'clock in the morning, it was another very warm day and I am tired. And browned off. Had to audition for choir this evening and didn't get in. And this after rehearsing with them for four weeks. Normally, I think, you rehearse for two weeks and then do your audition. But I wasn't able to be there on the day the auditions were planned for and then it seems they kind of forgot about me. Until I asked a question about something last week and it was all a big drama that I wasn't actually already an accepted member, culminating in one fairly agressive woman coming up to me at the beginning of rehearsal this evening to insist to me that I would not be allowed to sign up for the rehearsal weekend in September until after I had done an audition and been accepted.

Now, I'm not a great singer. I can hold a tune but I don't have a particularly strong voice and there is just nothing special about my voice. But I do have a lot of years of choir experience under my belt and wasn't really particularly worried about not being accepted. That woman's attitude and a couple of other things that I've noticed and experienced over the last few weeks were working in my mind the whole time that we were rehearsing this evening and I had actually decided that I would graciously decline the option of singing with them after my audition and was coming up with ways to phrase it politely. But as it turned out, I didn't sing well in the audition at all. He also asked me to sing something from the score of what we had been rehearsing this evening but I am not good at sightsinging, never particularly good at singing on my own and the fact that this audition was in front of five or six other people (I was so nervous when I realised people other than the conductor would be there that I never even counted) really didn't help. The conductor said that they only need altos who can sing very loudly and powerfully and that's why they wouldn't be taking me but really, I had sung badly enough that I knew I wasn't going to be taken. Even though I know that choir wasn't a good fit for me though, it's still horrible to be the one rejected instead of the one rejecting. Oh well.

After the week I've had and the effects of my most unwelcome guest still being felt, I am more than ready for this week to be over. But I still have to work tomorrow because I took Tuesday off (because of unwelcome guest being here - even if I did end up sending her packing that day). And what was the annoyance she created for me today? She moved an old suitcase (the kind of square/boxy looking type from the 60s). I knew she had obviously looked in it because what was resting on top of it was put back the wrong way around but this morning, as I was walking round the corner near where it stands, I stubbed my toes really badly. Because she put it back the wrong way around, it was occupying a couple of millimetres more space than usual (lid was to the outside rather than against the wall) and that was enough to put me off my stride/get in the way. Look away now if you're not fond of feet, you may not want to catch a glimpse of the photo down below! Here are a couple of others as illustration of some of what was done on Monday to increase distance between here and pic of bruise.

The (re-created) before. Actually, I realised afterwards that that cable wasn't even there, it was on the window sill. So it was just the books and the adapter. I had left these piled here without putting them onto the shelf below as they are the books I read before and during my move and I haven't yet added them to the list I keep of books I've read.

And this is how it looked when I got home. I'd like to point out that this bookshelf is in my bedroom. The more I think about the fact that she was tidying up stuff in my bedroom the more it annoys me. Whatever about being in there when I was there the evening before...if you are visiting someone and they are not at home, you just do not go into their bedroom at all. You just don't.









Trying to look on the bright side, being rejected by that choir means my weekend is now free and not taken up with two performances, I don't have to spend the money on the summer party planned for after the performance on Sunday and will save a bunch by not having to attend the weekend away in September. I've already checked out the university website (which I should have just done in the first place) and there's a choir or two there that look like feasible options for me. As most choirs here seem to take a break in August it does mean that I'll have to wait until September now, which is a bit annoying. There are worse things to deal with though. And in the meantime, I still do have my local choir to sing with. It might not be very good, but they are definitely more friendly. And positively thrilled to have someone under 60 joining them. :-)

Yep, that's a bruise alright.